Cilantro NO!

Cilantro, NO!

Supporting the fight against cilantro!

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Why does this exist
Why does Cilantro exist
We must fight this hell


Why does this exist
Why does Cilantro exist
We must fight this hell


Shitty shitty shit
Why am I eating this shit
Cilantro is shit


"H-Hide... I-I'm gonna-"
"Cum inside, daddy." Kaneki said.
"Oh, G-God-!" Hide's warm semen filled filled Kaneki's anus. "A-A-Ah! D-D-Daddy!" Kaneki bounced up and down on Hide's hard (and long) penis, receiving moans from each other. "A-AHHH!~"Kaneki came all over Hide's stomach and chest. Kaneki collapsed on Hide, breathing heavily.


what the hell is this
my taco won't be the same
with this cilantro


i love japan
dont worry not a weea
ouija bored it boring


Cilantro sucks big juicy d
Nobody likes it boring
Please can it go die


Cilantro sucks d
Fuq you cilantro you suck
Why do you exist


There is a bed onstage behind a silky curtain, backlit. PRINCE CHARMING (os) Once upon a time in a kingdom far, far away, the king and queen were blessed with a beautiful baby girl. And throughout the land, everyone was happy... until the sun went down and they saw that their daughter was cursed with a frightful enchantment that took hold each and every night. Desperate, they sought the help of a fairy godmother who had them lock the young princess away in a tower, there to await the kiss... of the handsome Prince Charming. [enters gallantly onstage] It was he who would chance the perilous journey through blistering cold and scorching desert traveling for many days and nights, risking life and limb to reach the Dragon's keep. For he was the bravest, and most handsome... in all the land. [looks at the audience] And it was destiny that his kiss would break the dreaded curse. He alone would climb to the highest room of the tallest tower to enter the princess's chambers, cross the room to her sleeping silhouette, pull back the gossamer curtains to find her... [pulls back the curtain to reveal WOLF in the bed. Gasps] WOLF What? CHARMING Princess... Fiona? WOLF No! CHARMING [relieved] Thank heavens. Where is she? WOLF She's on her honeymoon. CHARMING Honeymoon? With whom? 2 Scene 2 THE SWAMP SHREK It's so good to be home! Just you and me and... DONKEY [offstage] One is the loneliest number that you ever do...[enters] Two can be as bad as one... SHREK Donkey? DONKEY Shrek! Fiona! Aren't you two a sight for sore eyes! Give us a hug, Shrek, you old love machine. And look at you, Mrs. Shrek. How 'bout a side of sugar for the steed? SHREK Donkey, what are you doing here? DONKEY Taking care of your love nest for you. SHREK Oh, you mean like... sorting the mail and watering the plants? DONKEY Yeah, and feeding the fish! SHREK I don't have any fish. DONKEY You did. [looks around for the fish] SHREK Look at the time. I guess you'd better be going. DONKEY Don't you want to tell me about your trip? Or how about a game of Parcheesi? FIONA Actually, Donkey? Shouldn't you be getting home to Dragon? DONKEY Oh, yeah, that. I don't know. She's been all moody and stuff lately. I thought I'd move in with you. FIONA You know we're always happy to see you, Donkey. SHREK But Fiona and I are married now. We need a little time, you know, to be together. Just with each other. Alone. DONKEY Say no more. You don't have to worry about a thing. I will always be here to make sure nobody bothers you. SHREK Donkey! 3 DONKEY Yes, roomie? SHREK You're bothering me. DONKEY Oh, OK. All right, cool. I guess... Me and Pinocchio was going to catch a tournament, anyway, so...Maybe I'll see y'all Sunday for a barbecue or something. SHREK He'll be fine. Now, where were we? [giggles] Oh.I think I remember. Donkey! DONKEY I know, I know! Alone! I'm going! I'm going. What do you want me to tell these other guys? ROYAL MESSENGER enters to fanfare. MESSENGER [clears throat] "Dearest Princess Fiona. You are hereby summoned to the Kingdom of Far, Far Away for a royal ball in celebration of your marriage at which time the King will bestow his royal blessing... upon you and your...uh... Prince Charming. Love, the King and Queen of Far, Far Away. aka Mom and Dad." FIONA Mom and Dad? SHREK Prince Charming? DONKEY Royal ball? Can I come? SHREK We're not going. FIONA & DONKEY What? SHREK I mean, don't you think they might be a bit...shocked to see you like this? FIONA Well, they might be a bit surprised. But they're my parents, Shrek. They love me. And don't worry. They'll love you, too. SHREK Yeah, right. Somehow I don't think I'll be welcome at the country club. FIONA Stop it. They're not like that. SHREK How do you explain Sergeant Pompous and the Fancy Pants Club Band? FIONA Oh, come on! You could at least give them a chance. SHREK To do what? Sharpen their pitchforks? 4 FIONA No! They just want to give you their blessing. SHREK Oh, great. Now I need their blessing? FIONA If you want to be a part of this family, yes! SHREK Who says I want to be part of this family? FIONA You did! When you married me! SHREK Well, there's some fine print for you! FIONA [exasperated sigh] So that's it. You won't come? SHREK Trust me. It's a bad idea. We are not going! And that's final! ALL exit. SCENE 3 SHREK, DONKEY and FIONA re-enter with GINGY and PINOCHIO. SHREK is carrying luggage GINGY [walking by and picking up the ‘warning, Ogres sign’] Don't worry! We'll take care of everything. PINOCHIO Hey, wait for me. DONKEY Hit it! Move 'em on! Head 'em up! Head 'em up, move 'em on! Head 'em up! Move ‘em on, Rawhide! Knock 'em out! Pound 'em dead! Make 'em tea! Buy 'em drinks! Meet their mamas! Milk 'em hard! Rawhide! Yeehaw! SHREK, FIONA and DONKEY pass back and forth on the stage every time the E/E (Enter/exit symbol appears) DONKEY Are we there yet? SHREK No. DONKEY Are we there yet? FIONA Not yet. E/E 5 DONKEY OK, are we there yet? SHREK No. DONKEY Are we there yet? FIONA No


Cilantro Is Dumb,
Cilantro Is Retarded,
Cilantro is Hell


roses are red-ish
violets are blue? i think
cilantro more like cilantNO


It's called "devil weed"
Because it flipping sucks. Ew
Cilantro is hell


Wait, hold on my dude
Why is this website a thing?
Cuz cilantro sucks


What is flipping weird?
Cilantro is flipping weird
I low-key hate it


Cilantro is bad
Why is cilantro a thing
I hate cilantro


Cilantro tastes weird
What the heck am I eating
Ew ew ew ew ew


I hate cilantro
Cause it legit tastes like butt
We should get it banned


This is a haiku
About how cilantro sucks
We should get it banned


This is a haiku
About how cilantro sucks
We should get it banned


“I’m sorry, sorry, Kirito, I’m, ah, ah, com…com…coming—!!”

Asuna threw her body back while drawing out the last part of her sentence as she violently convulsed two, three times. Her breasts which were sticking out in front of her danced in time with those motions.

I was in no position to pause and admire the sight of Asuna with her eyes scrunched closed and her teeth gritted together looking incredibly cute, yet horribly lewd, all at the same time. As Asuna’s vagina gripped my penis tightly, I was once again assaulted with the powerful urge to come.

Thinking that I wouldn’t be able to resist it this time, I instinctively pushed up into Asuna’s core with abandon. Grabbing her hips with my hands, I shoved my hard penis in as far as I could before pulling out again.

“Ah—!! Aaaah—!!”

Being suddenly assaulted right after coming, all Asuna could do was frantically writhe about. I took her hand which was extended toward me and linked our fingers together. Every time I stirred up Asuna’s insides, our overflowing juices would fly about as the place of our joining melted in endless heat.

“Aah…amazing, amazing…”

Her bouncing breasts also sent large amounts of sweat flying about. Asuna was letting out deliriously sweet moans with a completely melted look on her face.

“Ah, A-A-Aaa!!”

“I-I’m com…”

“Ha, yes, let it out, ah, Kirito, let out, a lot…”

As I shoved myself into Asuna, I released all of the pent up sensations that I had stretched to the limits.



I could feel my hot sperm gushing deep into Asuna as she trembled in yet another climax. Two years worth of semen made a glopping noise as it flowed endlessly into Asuna. Every time my penis twitched, fireworks would go off in my head.


After receiving all that I had to give her, Asuna’s strength gave out as she fell on top of me.

“Ah… Ha…”