I do not consider anything contanting cilantro "food."
Do people in your family hate cilantro, too? Who?
Yes- mom and sister.
If cilantro were a historical malevolent dictator, who would it be? Why?
Stalin, because Stalin killed millions of innocent people with his evil ways. He was cold and heartless, and so is cilantro. Cilantro has killed millions of tastebuds with its evil ways. Both are the most horrible in their respective categories- dictator and "herb."
My cilantro story, first experience, recent anecdote, rant, etc...
Tried cilantro for the first time today when prompted by my sister. She told me what it tasted like and about the cilantro gene theory, which I immediately and foolishly dismissed as heresay. When I put a leaf in my mouth, I instantly regretted my foolsihness. O, the horror! The vileness! Cilantro is a pox upon my delicate palate! My initial disgust quickly turned into rage as I read many people's cilantro-praising comments on the internet. Cilantro-lovers say that cilantro-haters "just haven't tried it in the right foods" or "ate rotten cilantro." What?!? I don't care how great the dish containing cilantro could be; the minute the cilantro is introduced, it negates all good taste. Really, how could you disguise that vile odor, that sickening, all-pervading, fetid taste? I liked the comment about, "maybe you just ate rotten cilantro." How could it go bad when it's that horrible to begin with? Is this person dismissing hundreds of cilantro horror stories by saying that all of those people were just too stupid to look and see whether the herb was dried out and brown or waterlogged and slimy with age? Fools! Admit it! The devil doesn't work in mysterious ways! the devil works in one way, and it's cilantro! AAAAAAHGH! FUCK! YOOOOOOU!
More about me:
This poster has since been transferred to Undertree Medical Facility where she will be treated for Cilantritis. Cilantritis is a disease brought on instantaneously upon consumption of cilantro. Symptoms include but are not limited to vomitting, spitting and tongue-cleansing rituals approximating severe OCD, anger, pinpoint pupils, screaming and thrashing, foaming at the mouth and extreme violence. If you or someone you know has contracted Cilantritis, call 911 (or 999) and seek a quiet, secure area preferrably stocked with French pastries.
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