November 22, 2017
When I was yet a young lass, I stumbled upon my neighbor's garden, and there it was: a foul beast so big and strong, his only desire to rip through the tongue and throat with a revolting blow of pain and agony. I tried to escape it's torture, but it was too late. The evil monstrosity that is cilantro have devoured my every taste bud, and managed to creep it's way all the way down my throat.I suffered, arms flailing, and a scream so horrendous and full of despair. I fell over with shock, and felt as the wicked monster seemed to devour my very soul. And that, cilantro haters, is what my dear sister described to me just moments before the foul cilantro took her very life.