September 18, 2007
My story goes like this:
I don't remember my first experience clearly, but I do know that the first time I put some into my mouth and experienced that almost physical slapping sensation that rocket-propels itself throughout the nasal cavity like rubber cement, like a factory-produced Kevorkian chemical coctail, there was literally no other experience I could use to compare it with. Nothing else tastes like it, but taking a huge whiff of liquid Drano or diesel fuel might be the closest analogous sensations. How IN THE HELL someone would EVER think: "MY WORD! This is exactly what I've been yearning to deliberately insert into my food," isn't just a mystery to me, it's where the line is drawn between myself and all that is evil and ungodly. I would sooner squeeze a bottle of toothpaste into my food. Other people just love it! All I can reason is that they must belong to a different species than I do. Down with cilantro!